i feel so angry with myself! i'm feeling, experienceing and doing the wrong things when i noe tat i'm not suppose 2 be tat way! why? why can't i applied what i've learnt and accept things as they are?! why must i still have those stupid idoitic emotions?!?!!?!

2day from 8plus am was at PKFT le.. hmm did duty full day bahz? haha! morning taught some1 new.. then afternoon hui yin came in but ya, i din manage 2 study -_- this is getting bad.. i'm gonna chiong project 2night and tmr! cos monday morning got duty too.. so tmr muz sleep... so muz finish by tmr.. lunch with shifus was a quiet affair.. but the food was nice!!! we did talk later thou.. somehow, i think the more elderly shifus like to make fun of me.. haha! dunno y... yep.. stayed till 5plus, meet debbie for dinner at market, went back. then move everything upstairs to continue duty... then had class, then after class continue duty till ard 10 bahz.. had a talk with shifu.. i broke down in front of her.. was embarassed but din felt as pai-seh tat i tot i would be.. haha! busy day 2day! :) but every1 was very nice.. really, i felt very touched and happy :)
oh! kitty mei ling kind of nearly destryied my pants!! she jumped on me again 2day. but she wanted me 2 caryy her to walk ard -_- so she was 'scratching' my laps thou it din hurt la.. refuse to go off my lap -_- but it was nice cuddling her ^_^

2day is another fruitful day! haha! or i should say more fun? :P
morning went PKFT at 8.45am to do duty till 12noon.. no one really came to sign up but i did pick up a few phone calls.. played a lot with kitty Mei Ling today! cos Annie went out without 'telling' her so she came looking for me. but i was studying at a moment so wasn't really bothered with her.. and miss kitty jump up on my lap while i was studying! i got a shock but was ok. i told her to go down and wait till Annie comes back, but she was quite persistant for me to give her food i think, i so hop up the table and sat on my notes! until a kind lasy came and ask me 'she bully u arh?' and somehow, Mei was scared of her.. haha!!! but poor Mei threw a tantrum, or maybe she was tired bahz.. so she kind of refused to move about -_- hmmm DXSF kinf od freaked me out 2day.. she saw me carrying my bag, then the following happened:
DXSF: u going home arh?
me: ya, go home to eat so wun be eating with u shifu le :)
DXSF: no! u cannot go home! (fiercly!)
me: huh?
DXSF: NO! U CANNOT GO HOME! I WUN LET U GO HOME!
me: huh?
DXSF: u muz eat with us 1st then u can go home!

i was totally shocked but shifu laughed cos she managed to scare me -_- but ok la.. i made her day! haha! DYSF also asked me to stay and eat with them.. but i had lunch home today.. i will be eating with them tmr thou ^_^ and DDSF made me eat oragnes 2day too! haha! but ok la, i wanted 2 eat oso de :P

then at night went PKFT again at 6.45 like tat to do more duty.. wow!! busy man! to many ppl came and sign up for things! well, stayed in the partition for both the shifu's lesson and chanting cos had to jagar the money... then stayed till like 10 then went home.. but well, had fun.. and shifus are expecting me tmr morning again! ^_^ and i'll be there till 10 again! haha!!!

i went PKFT to do my HMT assignment 2day! damm shiok!!! cos managed to understand and do a lot! ^_^ yeah! sat another full day there! yahoo!!! ^_^
talk with different shifus today.. or should i say chat? well, chat seems to be a wrong word to use in this case.. should say an exchange of words bahz :) DDSF, DXSF, CYSF, CHSF, Annie, Shi-Gong a bit la, even DYSF also talked a bit with us. did 晚课 and then, well, yep, cos we ate dinner with them.. it was a quiet but fun affair? haha! cos it was as wat Annie or CYSF said, 'its party time?' cos we had love letters, different types of nuts and fruits after the actual dinner! haha! and of course verything was vegeterian. but the food was so nice thou simple! yummy! but i think thru dinner time fran and me were kind of nervous.. i think she was kind of shocked that we were sitting with shifus on the same table to eat.. haha! after dinner, wash up, then sweep the floor ard bodhi tree, then went back in to rest and wait for a lift to our repective night classes.. cos yep, juz nice fren de taught by CYSF, mine taught by DYSF. so followed them.. ya.. was a bit pai seh.. kept thanking annie and DYSF :p saw CNSF and CQSF while we walked towards the car.. haha! i was feeling a little scared when i saw their car and i dunno y.. lol! haha! ya.. so went for class then home le lor :D

weow!!! 2 months plus never upload le!!! many things haf happened... update by months in summary...
Jan:
1) it seems that mr d has refused 2 acknowledge my pressence le.. so... i'm learning to say goodbye to him le... yea.. and when its goodbye, it will be goodbye... wun see u ever again...
2) had class gathering at inght safari.. was unique and fun! haha!
3) had dinner with su hua, which was supposed to happen since last year aug but drag till ya.. now.. lol!!!
4) started to go for CYSF's wed classes at pu min shi. was a different kind of class to me, but i find it more relaxed and enjoyable ^_^
5) celebrated pt and zk bro's birthdays, simple and nice :D

Feb:
1) had a dinner at ale's place.. she and me cooked dinner and we enjoyed all the food! haha!!! talked and had fun... ale drove wt and sj home and i went with her juz in case she lost the way or fell asleep.. reached home ard 1plus 2 :P haha!!!
2) had a girls gathering at JUMBO!!! shan din come cos she was rushing assignments so can't blame her.. food was nice! atmosphere was nice! many pics taken.. (the last time i took 72 with ale before she fly back to aussie)
3) arrival of CNY, had reunion dinner with some ppl.. not really convenient to mention who here.. dinner was nice, many family photos taken! ^_^ really nice! then as usual, 1st day was spent at uncle's house, playing cards. 2nd day din really go out but only to temple, details later.. 3rd day uncles house again.
4) 2nd day of CNY was spent at temple as mentioned. gong yang all the shifus as well as some external shifus. then had prayers and then lunch. then stay back with debbie and fran to watch a video... but left early for doc, cos i was down with FOOD POISIONING!!! ya.. but i was not the only one, only just that i was the most serious case -_- was down for ard 1 week till..
5) 22nd feb, ninth day of cny, had gong tian at PKFT as well as medicine buddha chanting. gong tian happened at 3.30am.. debbie was kind to fetch me there ^_^ then pray till 6.30am, then at 7.30am had candlelight duty. fran was on duty with me.. haha! then had chanting, thou i think i dozed off most of the time :P sorry!!! then lunch with lye wah and ping ping [there is another buddha fren by the name of pingping :)] then ya... follow lye wah while she teach me the duties ard the temple so that i can do her duty next time... then went home le lor.. haha!
6) had some mid-term test.. think wun do really well for PM but MAB ok de!! :D
7) lost my voice not because of sore throat.. my voice cord was swollen and infected.. dun as me y cos i oso dunno... but lost vocie is really lost... not juz say very little voice.. its really NO VOICE!!! it was bad... so ppl, treasure the time when u are able to speak :)
8) went to see wei ting and alesia off at the airport.. wt cried, alesia was holding back i think... i only cried when i nearly got home.. i'm sad they haf 2 go back... but, i believe december will come around very very soon! ^_^ WILL MISS U GIRLS!!! KEEP IN CONTACT SOMEHOW!!!! ^_^
9) wed classes at kmspks, fridays at PKFT resumed, sat meditation class started, chantings on the 1sat and 15th day resumed... well, shifu has told our names to some other volunteers, so tat we can help them some days.. well, haf more duty la.. but its good :D wun let it affect my school work de :)

march:
shifu has added some duties for me cos i'm comfortable with chinese.. so yea.. long story, difficult to exlpain so skip :P
dad's birthday.. going out for dinner lo!!! yeah!