i hate u cos i liked u...
i am now totally at lost at wat 2 do...
u dun owe me anything now, and neither do i owe u anything...
but is this the way 2 treat a person?
is this the way 2 treat a fren?
or am i no longer a fren?
i was damm sad and ouched 2day la!
u really are an idiot la!!!!
the more i type the more angry and disappointed i am la...
i am oso getting more sad la...
i am trying very hard not 2 cry...
haf been telling myself its not worth it...
but the blow tat comes 2 me by u is juz getting larger and larger la...
i cannot take it de..
i seem so strong on the outside...
but do u noe tat i am not tat stong and tat i need u acutally?
but now i dun think i need u le...
u can be declared almost gone in my life...
y i say almost is cos i am soft hearted and u will oways be 4given no matter wat...
things will change...
u will change..
but 4 now...
i dun think my feelings will yet...
not as yet..
thou there is addition of anger and disappointments..
but the old feeling is still there..
and my i juz soften when i see u..
and i can't really bear 2 hate u...
haiz..
i dunno wat i am toking la..
hate or dun hate?
i dunno...
but pls dun treat me so badly anymore can? i am a girl and i do get hurt very esaily....

sayonara, domo arigato!
zai zian, xie xie!
bye bye, thanks!


4 nothing?

hiaz... i am so damm disappointed... can't be happy de nehz... haiz.. so many things haf happened in the past few days tat its making me go all sad sad.. haiz.. i really very tired le lor.. sometimes, i juz can't take it la... things haf shown tat ppl do change... and in many many cases, for the worst, not 4 the better... haiz...

hopefully, tmr will be a better day :)

2day mood no no good..
i'm 2 stressed and tired le... and 2day so many ppl de mood was so bad... anger, sadness, depressions i seen them all 2day... so many ppl venting out their anger thru msn on me... its ok la.. at least thru msn i feel nothing...

i reach an extent where i cried again.. i really cannot handle so many things la.. seriously, mp is gonna kill me sooner or later le.. haiz... i feel like dying! -_-'''

hmm.. it has been a while since i last nlog.. cos was 2 tired and busy with my MP, and oso not really in the mood 2 blog so yea...
last week we cooked all the soups planned 2 sell in the cafe 4 sensory evaluation... we cooked 5 soups within 1 hour 30mins worz.. not bad not bad... but comments on the soup jiu not really tat well le bahz.. haiz... anyways, yea.. tat is tat and done with soups! haha!!!
celebrated boon de birthday last fri as well... well, she was surprised too! haha!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAL!!! i noe u very very happy cos of this and tat right? hehe :P u noe wat i mean la.. haha!!! acarde with boon in the afternoon 4 a while then off 2 dinner le... with shan, nee, aeng, lisi and shu jie...

as i sai,d i wasn't really in the mood 2 blog.. hmm, reason its a bit complicated bahz.. so therefore, in order 2 make myself sleep more soundly, be more high and happy and try 2 4get many many things, i bought a glass bottle of volka last fri and drank it up... i guess i drank a little 2 fast? ended up having my heart pumping very very fast and very very hard, till i can't really sleep.. and worst still, next day woke up haf 2 suffer from hang-over inclusive of headache, giddiness and worst, GASTRIC FULL DAY!! i wanted 2 kill myself lor... plus my leg muscles pain from previous day de some games, i was walking like a penguinish-duckish style the whole day... feel so damm wobbly la... but i still dun feel any better.. hiaz... so sad :(

u will be off, i wun see u.
i was here, but u never saw me.
u sounded fierce, i was shocked.
i cried, u never will noe...

something strange is going on and i can't explain y.... water juz wanna drop out, i feel as if there is a burden in my heart and its super irritating... wat is it? i dunno... what should i do? i dunno... perheaps u noe? nahz.. i dun think any1 will noe.. okies.. i'm bored, i'm bo liao.. but tat burden thingy is true... i juz feel so... 心烦.. haiz..

imagine this scene:
a cinema theater meant for around 50 people seating. u enter it with 2 of your frens, and realise, that the whole theater only got the 3 of u!!! will u freak out? or will u feel shiok? well, that iswat happened 2 me, shan and boon when we decided 2 go watch underdog 2day... at suntec, and there was only the 3 of us... only when the flim start then was was ard 5 or 6 more ppl joining us.. -_-.. i never experience something like tat b4...
we went eating muffins and doughnuts 2day.. SHIOK! haha!!! hmm oso played some gun games, drum games and car racing, aka the arcade.. haha!!! SHIOK SHIOK!!!

i tried 2 start a topic with u, i failed. i was sad, but it more or less made me wanna give up even more bahz.. but as the saying goes, 'shuo dao rong yi zuo dao nan' haiz...

where r u when i need u most now?
i receive no encouragements, i feel so dead now..
i feel like crying now!
i'm tired, i'm stressed, i'm sad, i'm scared...
a ping without u or your encouragements is a dead ping...
haiz argh sob sob...